It's Friday before deadweek! 2 more weeks and I'll be in my last quarter at Poly. Scary. Last night was very different than I had expected it might be. I unexpectedly was visited by a couple of old and dear friends from Santa Barbara. The evening wasn't particularly eventful, but the sudden thrust of a a person you haven't seen substantially for 2 or 3 years generally brings back memories that you'd nearly forgotten, or in this case ruminations regarding the effect that person had in the direction your life took.

When I first started seeing her I was in a bad place, but worse yet I didn't realize it at all. Ana and I had just broken up a few months ago, and I thought I was enjoying my new found freedom... in retrospect though I was floundering. After spending such a substantial amount of time with one person only I think I missed out on a lot of personal development. I quite honestly didn't know who I was, but truly thought that I did. With her I quickly discovered what I was capable of, strengths and weaknesses and things I never knew about myself. It was a very influential time in my college career. I think I've expounded in past entries about the weirdness of my 2nd year here at Poly, and how that was when everything really started changing. The winter break was the quite literally the locus of all of that change. What's more, when our brief romantic involvement came to an end there was no grand climactic moment, no huge fight, and no tears. We simply both signed off AIM one day and didn't speak again for a month or more.

Some people affect you slowly, molding your personality over time like a small river eventually creates a canyon. Others change things suddenly and all at once; a great storm of change that ends quickly but whose irrevocable effects are felt all at once but perhaps not understood for some time. Maybe that's a lame way of putting it, maybe it's not. In any case it's personally true. It was good to see you again.